Couples Therapy

Relationship

We crave it. We dread it.

This isn’t what you expected. How can it be so complicated?

You wanted love, passion, understanding, support, friendship.

You got arguments, misunderstandings, criticism, rejection.

These days you just dread being in each other’s presence and utterly avoid being alone together.

You’re lonely. Angry. Sad.

The honeymoon is OVER!

All that love and affection, the excitement of being together, talking for hours, feeling appreciated and desired – ALL GONE!

You can’t say anything right. You can’t do anything right. Your spouse just doesn’t get you. You’re the “bad guy.” You can’t win.

You just don’t know what else to do. Just thinking about being together fills you with anxiety.

You’ve tried to address the issues on your own, but you can’t resolve anything. You just end up fighting, instead.

How did you end up here? Can you even fix this? Should you stay, or should you go?

You’re a Relational Being

You’re wired to attach. You’re a social being. You dream of feeling loved, understood, appreciated.

You dream of coming home to someone who can’t wait to greet you with excitement, love, kindness – just the thought of him or her fills you with warmth and joy.

You dream of the one – the one who can meet your needs, desires and wishes. The one who gets you – who’s interested, excited, who longs to spend time with you.

And so, you find that person. You fall madly in love – can’t wait to spend every second of your day together. You have long, exciting conversations. You connect. You’ve come home.

But one day, you wake up to the exact opposite of all that. Was it all just a dream?

Or are you now living a nightmare?

How can you get the dream back?

Achieve your goals as a couple

When we meet, we’ll focus on two steps:

We’ll explore what’s working in your relationship – and keep it.

We’ll determine what’s not working, remove it, and replace it with something better.

You’ll learn when and how to use new skills that promote your connection as a couple.

You may be stuck doing the same thing repeatedly, despite not getting the results you want, just because you don’t know what else to do.

You’re likely mimicking either what you observed growing up or what was once done to you.

In therapy, you’ll do something different.

You’ll get out of your comfort zone.

Armed with tools, support, and encouragement, you’ll try things that aren’t familiar, things that will work.

In therapy, you’ll examine and tackle, head on, the issues that get you stuck as you learn new, more effective, ways to address and resolve what’s getting you stuck.

We’ll work together to develop a plan to design, build, and nurture the type of relationship you want to have once you understand exactly what you need and want to be happy in a relationship. We’ll also talk about how you ask for it!

Always in a relationship, listening and communicating are key aspects. I will help you learn to communicate more clearly and intentionally – and to listen and understand your partner.